don't wanna be sleazy all nasty and cheesy
all of that rawness was so free and needy
i can only dream of what it was meant to be
or fantasize of how he could please me

resisting temptation of this dangerous addiction
this drug and affliction of pain
and the friction of my ideal depiction of love
a true one that i always envisioned
but rather eviction and hate that was made
by the trade of affection and a venomous rage

unrest and nightmares were brought
lost and accosted and locked in thoughts
of the right and the wrong
yet i still became fond
of the sensual nights
only then was it calm
I've grown up and grown strong
I've dreamed this for so long
and now is the dawn
to go on

time for myself
to arrange all the shelves
be done with the torment and hell
questions and eggshells
quell all the yells
only time will tell

looking forward to the day
i look back at this time in my life
when i once fell.